Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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