Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize