Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
