That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
