remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
