the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
