is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Never let your siblings swipe right.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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