Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
