just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I could fuck to npr.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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