Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
