Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize