She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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