she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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