if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
my liver is dry heaving
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
