My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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