Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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