It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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