She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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