i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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