sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
