I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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