Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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