have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I need to stop coming to work sober
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
