i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
