My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
