i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize