just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
