no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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