I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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