Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
