i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Do you have feelings for this penis?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
