The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm sobbing to NWA
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
