You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
