The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize