So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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