Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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