My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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