Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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