Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
there's paper in my vomit.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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