Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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