So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
