I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
