By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
