Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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