Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
