sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
