you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
