thus making me awesome and them whores
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
