i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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