There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
