just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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