Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
