My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
